Friday, August 12, 2022

You Can Choose

Today I thought my heart would burst.

The day began with the capacity to get me down and ruin my week, but instead, my heart is bursting with happiness.

I know there are many things happening in the world today that are serious issues. One only needs to ponder the war in the Ukraine, climate disasters around the world, viruses, health issues and inflation – and it all has the capacity to break us, to make us sad, and to push us beyond our limits.

I refuse to let it.

My lousy week was full of renovation issues and unexpected health concerns that have seriously set me back and have me a bit worried, but, then a friend came by with muffins and we had a wonderful visit. After that I climbed into my makeshift splash pool to cool off and soaked in the beauty of what was all around me. At 3:30 it was time to go to the local pub to have a beer with “the gang” and there we delved into a heartfelt discussion on water conservation and how we as individuals can get beyond our outdated notions of what is beautiful, say goodbye to our lawns, and embrace what the planet is telling us it needs.

It gave me hope. (And the beer was good too!!)

Before I left, another dear friend had offered to come help me hang my shower curtain and I again was filled with a sense of gratitude for the community I am a part of. These moments of gratitude help me see past my current health issues and see the world for what is - beautiful.

I refuse to give in to despair. The world is not going to hell in a hand basket. The world is beautiful – and we can all be a part of making it that way - of preserving it. We are the world.

When I got home, I poured myself a glass of local red wine and heaped some fresh garden vegetables on my plate, and as I sat in the yard eating, looking at the mountain and the burgeoning cumulous clouds all around me I felt an overwhelming sense of joy and contentment.

Contentment had eluded me my whole life (just read my book and you will know what I mean). And even though at his moment I have good reason to feel afraid and mad and sad – I am content. I truly am.

After dinner as my chickens took their daily dirt bath, I walked (hobbled) about my garden and breathed in the bounty…I saw ripening tomatoes and a new little melon…a rare heirloom. I counted several little squash (squashes?)- terribly late to arrive – but welcomed. There were peppers – green, red, orange, and purple, and large peaches beginning to blush. Artichokes and sunflowers were ready for picking and the petunias and dahlias looked so happy.

How could I possibly be sad when I am so very blessed.

Even while the fires burn around me – and smoke wafts up over the mountain behind my house from a new fire started close by yesterday, I have hope. There is always hope.

While I was pondering my blessings my phone rang and it was my number one son…calling to talk about the weather…one of my favorite things to do.

I miss storm chasing.

We talked about the cloud formations all around us. Towering cumulonimbus clouds were beginning to anvil at the top and I could see the formation of mammatus clouds under the anvil. It was beautiful.

Life is beautiful.


How lucky am I that my son calls so frequently – that he shares my love of food and clouds. How lucky am I that my other sons are healthy and doing so well. I am a proud mama.

We all have a choice: to dwell on the negative things in our life – or to embrace the beauty.


Hanging On

Since arriving in Uluwatu I have had the privilege of meeting a couple of very nice ladies: Taryn from California, and Mette from Denmark. I...